Indian woman and black men dating
I’ve found that I almost always worry that a guy is reading me in one of these two extreme ways.And I do an exhausting dance of guessing which one it is so I can counter it with the appropriate behavior.And that external gaze is powerful: the invisibility desexualized me. Two, specifically, over four years of high school – not exactly like I rotated through all of the Harlem Wizards or something. Not exactly the stuff nice little Indian girls are made of.
It wasn’t just that I was not seen as attractive (because that is subjective overall, color aside); it was that I was wholly invisible during that high school process of exploring sex and romance.
My friends flirted, dated, and hooked up casually and significantly.
One Indian classmate even asked me once, “Do your parents know about this?
” As if I had gotten caught snorting heroine at a brothel.
So instead, I kept quiet and clung to the good Indian girl in me: while others gave blowjobs in bushes at house parties (yes, these were the sexual norms I was around as a teenager), I mostly steered clear of the bases past second.